[ She shakes her head as best she can given her circumstances, belly to the mattress and her face cradled in his hands. ]
It's not your fault.
[ (Not your fault I'm the age I am, not your fault I love you, not your fault I know how to do everything but this.)
He's doing what's best, isn't he? In this interaction, he is the adult and she is the child and even though it is her parents who keep him in employ, he ultimately has the last say. (Right? Sometimes she sees the panic in his expression and it's because she's parsed together that that's all it would take that she tries to keep herself from crying. It's not fair. Or at least, that's how she rationalizes it to herself, despite the ache that grows heavier within her chest by the day. It isn't fair for her to wield that kind of power, never mind the shadow that he casts over her life as a whole.)
This argument, at best, is a circular one — both of them eager to take the blame as if it would somehow make things easier — but she doesn't know how else to steer it. As if in turn, she reaches out, too, tracing over the lines of his face. ]
Don't look so sad. Can't take care of you as well as you take care of me.
no subject
It's not your fault.
[ (Not your fault I'm the age I am, not your fault I love you, not your fault I know how to do everything but this.)
He's doing what's best, isn't he? In this interaction, he is the adult and she is the child and even though it is her parents who keep him in employ, he ultimately has the last say. (Right? Sometimes she sees the panic in his expression and it's because she's parsed together that that's all it would take that she tries to keep herself from crying. It's not fair. Or at least, that's how she rationalizes it to herself, despite the ache that grows heavier within her chest by the day. It isn't fair for her to wield that kind of power, never mind the shadow that he casts over her life as a whole.)
This argument, at best, is a circular one — both of them eager to take the blame as if it would somehow make things easier — but she doesn't know how else to steer it. As if in turn, she reaches out, too, tracing over the lines of his face. ]
Don't look so sad. Can't take care of you as well as you take care of me.